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« on: August 12, 2008, 12:20:31 PM »

Dancing on the Water

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Reg : 09/21/2005




         Date Posted: 10/11/2005 10:47 AM                           


Hello guys,

This is a nice forum but it is mostly about how to become multiorgasmic while masturbating. I wanted to know if it is possible to help my man experience more than one orgasm, or just something bigger than an ordinary orgasm, while making love? What could i possibly do for him? Any ideas/advice?

Thanks



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PanDragon


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Posts : 133
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         Date Posted: 10/12/2005 12:01 AM                               


Hello guys,

Hi Dancing

>This is a nice forum but it is mostly about how to become multiorgasmic while masturbating.

 That's true. And there's a couple good reasons why most of the posts here are about mastrubation:

  1. Because it's usually easier for men to first learn how to become multi-orgasmic through solo practice and then learn how to apply their new ability to lovemaking.

  The first major hurdle in any MMO technique is learning how to deal with The Point of No Return. Until a man learns how to resolve this issue and separate orgasm from ejaculation, a partner will usually only serve as a distraction and make MMO's even more difficult to achieve. Therefore, it's usually just easier to stick to "regular" sex while he practices his MMO's techniques solo on the side. When he's already practiced enough to feel confident in his new ability to have MMO's, it helps reduce any possble feelings of performance pressure when it comes time to share it a partner.  

  2. Because there simply aren't a lot of multi-orgasmic men out there posting in forums these days. LOL! Of course, I'm doing my best to help change that...  

>  I wanted to know if it is possible to help my man experience more than one orgasm, or just something bigger than an ordinary orgasm, while making love?

  Yes, it certainly possible to help a man have MMO's. But to be honest, it really depends on your man and what he wants. Does he want to have multiple orgasms? Does he believe it's possible? Has he actually said he wants to experience MMO's? Is he willing to spend time and effort learning techniques to achieve them? All of these things make a difference in what you can do for him as well as what he can do for himself.

  There's an old joke about hypnosis: How many hypnotherapists does it take to change a light bulb? One. But the light bulb has to really want to change!  

  The point being that hypnosis can do amazing things for people, but only if they want it to happen...

  The same is true for men and MMO's. You can do everything just right, but if he's not ready, willing, and able, it's not gonna happen.

>  What could i possibly do for him? Any ideas/advice?

  Depending on how receptive he is, there's a LOT you can do for him. But before we get into that, just remember that he is his own source of ultimate pleasure. He needs to take responsiblilty for his orgasmic pleasure and want to increase it. The best way to help him is to support him in finding his own way to MMO's. After all, he'll be missing out on a wonderful feeling of accomplishment if someone else does it for him.

  But having said that, I do have some suggestions...

  1. Hypnosis. Hypnosis is a great "quick fix" for increasing sexual pleasure and performance. Depending on the skill of the hypnotist and the willingness of the subject, almost anything you can imagine can be accomplished.

  If you have money to burn, you can talk with your man about what changes he would want in his sex life - better erections, more stamina, multiple orgasms, etc? It's all possible with the right hypnotist. Then he can either go in a for a few sessions, or better yet, you can both go in together and be hypnotized as a couple! It all depends on what you can afford and how skilled the hypnotist is. And although sessions may be expensive, it's probably the quickest and easiest way to create amazing changes in your sex life, and can be a great investment for a long term relationship.

  Of course, if like me and most other folks, you don't have money to burn, there are still ways that you can use hypnosis to help your man. For instance, check out the "Hypnotize Your Lover" book and Cd set here. Hypnosis is actually much easier to do than most people think and it's a great way for couples to have fun and increase their feelings of intimacy. Even "amateur" hypnotists can do some amazing things for a willing partner.

  Here is a great little erotic story (http://www.mcstories.com/AdultEducation/AdultEducation.html) that illustrates some of the many ways in which couples may benefit from learning to use hypnosis together. Although the story itself is fictional, and some of the effects may be slightly exaggerated, the various techniques it describes are both real and effective. So I think it's worth reading just to get an idea of how they can be applied in a relationship.

  Another great little product (www.saladltd.co.uk/ericksonian_hypnosis_cards.htm) that my wife and I recently started using is a deck of playing cards that have hypnotic language patterns printed on them. It's based on an older deck called "ZEBU Cards" that went out of production years ago. Neither of us has ever read any books on this type of hypnosis, but we were both able to hypnotize each other within less than an hour, just by using the sample phrases straight from the cards.

  Here's another great little story (http://www.mcstories.com/Zebu/Zebu.html) by the same author that does an excellent job of describing how you can use these cards to casually slip hypnotic suggestions to each other while you play. It's easy to learn and loads of fun. And best of all, you can use these cards for virtually anything, so they're a great way for couples to help each other improve in all kinds of ways from self-esteem and stress reduction to excerise and improving sleep.

  Anyway, there's literally thousands of ways you can use hypnosis to help improve your sex life, as well as your partner's. And most of them are being freely taught on the net in places like this. Not to mention all the professional audio and video programs that are being sold. Chances are you can find something fun, effective, and affordable.

  2. Prostate Stimulation. This particular technique is somewhat controversial. Not everyone is comfortable with the idea. However, I'm mentioning it because it's one of the only ways in which you can actively participate in giving your partner MMO's without prior training or experience.

  The prostate is the most sexually sensitive place on a man's body and most of us have never even had it massaged in a sensual way (doctor visits don't count! LOL). It has the potential to induce tremendous feelings of orgasm for long periods of time without ejaculation. So depending on how adventurous you are as a couple and as individuals, it can be a great asset (no pun intended) to your sex life.

  Manual Prostate massage using the fingers is a centuries old traditon in many countries and cultures. However, I know nothing about it as a technique, and so I'm not recommending it here.

  What I can recommend is 2 products: The Aneros and The Deluxe Crystal Wand.

  Each has a specific benefit for prostate stimulation.

  The Aneros, is an internally controlled device, meaning that once it's inserted, your man controls it using his internal muscle structure. It's not something you can  "use it on him" like a dildo. However, because it's an internal device, it very easy to have intercourse or recieve oral sex while he's using it.

  If you check out the Aneros forum, you'll see that this toy rarely creates instant results. It often takes time and practice before men begin to experience multiple orgasms using it. However, if your man sticks with it long enough to start feeling the benefits, it can turn a simple blowjob into a truly mind-blowing experience.

  The Deluxe Crystal Wand is an externally controlled device, which he can either use solo or you can use to directly massage his prostate by gently manipulating the handle. Although it's not so great for use during intercourse, the advantage of this device is that it offers you a chance to switch roles as a couple.

  By allowing you to take over control of the wand, your man can experience something few men ever do - being made to cum over and over agian by one's partner without any loss of arousal. It's a deeply vulnerable experience for a man to be in such a position. Meanwhile, you may find it exciting to feel the power and control of creating wave after wave of intense orgasmic sensations in your man with only the slightest movements of the handle...

  Like I said, prostate stimulation isn't for everyone and it defintiely requires some time and practice in order to be effective. But for some couples, it can be a profoundly intimate and erotic experience.

  And finally, this will probably come as no surprise to anyone who's read my posts before, my best recommendation for helping your man to become multi-orgasmic is....(drum roll....)

  3. KSMO  A.k.a., the Key Sound Multiple Orgasm technique. This is my personal favorite. Mainly because it's how I learned to become multi-orgasmic, but also because it's the only technique that both men and women can truly share together as a couple.

  So here's my recommendation: Check out the website, especially the Forum and Transcripts of the Live Coaching Chats. If it looks appealing to you, ask your man if he might want to try it too. If not, that's ok. With time and a little practice, you can still help him experience multiple orgasms just by sharing what you've learned.

  One of the amazing things about KSMO is that even if only one partner has learned it, both partners can benefit from the increased orgasmic energy. Over time, you can become more and more expressive with your deepest feelings of pleasure, and in response he can become more and more open to recieving it. With KSMO, you can literally share your orgasmic energy with your man, and as long as he is receptive to it, he can learn to "ride" your orgasms like waves and actually feel your pleasure in his own body. Eventually with continued practice, he will be able to feel your orgasms almost as if they were his own.

  And the great thing about KSMO is, it's not gender-specific. So once he's actually felt your orgasmic energy moving through his body in waves, he might become open to the possibility that he can create the same multi-orgasmic waves, using the very same technique.

  Sometimes us guys are hard-headed and all the talking in the world won't convince us that something is worth trying. But if you can just show him how KSMO feels, by helping him feel what you're feeling, there's a good chance your man will be inspired to try it too!

  One last, VERY IMPORTANT TIP: If you or your man decide to try KSMO, and the technique appears not to be working, go to the website and ask for help. That's what the community is there for. Ask questions in the Forum, attend a Live Coaching Chat or two. Trust me, the technique works. But it's easy to miss small details in the instructions or be just a little off in your practice and not realize it. So always make sure you ask for help if you're not getting the results you wanted. You might be surprised how much difference a little advice can make!

  Well, I know this was a long reply, but I hope it was helpful. Lemme know what you think and of course, feel free to keep asking questions!

  Pandragon  



"There is no such as thing as piano playing; I have tried it many times and nothing came of it."

- Paul Watzlawick, author of "The Language of Change"

Message edited by: PanDragon on 10/12/2005 10:58:58[Server Time/GMT -8 Pacific Time]

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Dancing on the Water

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         Date Posted: 10/12/2005 10:48 AM                           


Hi PanDragon !

Thank you for the fast and such a good reply! I haven't talked to my boyfriend about it yet. I wanted to surprise him, kind of, but looks like it's not as possible  I will write more soon,  unfrotunately i dont have much time now! Thanks again for your help!!

Good luck!



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PanDragon


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Posts : 133
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         Date Posted: 10/12/2005 6:00 PM                               


  I'm always happy to be of service.  

  Looking forward to your next post!  



"There is no such as thing as piano playing; I have tried it many times and nothing came of it."

- Paul Watzlawick, author of "The Language of Change"
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Dancing on the Water

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         Date Posted: 10/13/2005 7:55 AM                           

Hi Dragon !

How's life?

Sooo, i've tried to talk to my boyfriend about multiple orgasms.... "Does he want to have multiple orgasms?" - Yes, he would like to know what it feels like, but he seems rather passive.... "Does he believe it's possible?" - Not really, it seemed to me... even though he got interested and said it would be cool if it were true.  "Has he actually said he wants to experience MMO's? Is he willing to spend time and effort learning techniques to achieve them?" Yes, he said he wants, but as for time, he is one of the people who want things now, and who can give it up if it doesn't work for too long... Also, he is quite satisfied with our sex life, and me too, actually, but if it can be better, why not try?  And i think it can simply be fun to do! But we want to try!!

You know, the first thing that's gonna be hard (and i guess, it's similar with most men, huh?) is that it seems hard for him to realize that an orgasm can happen separately from ejaculation. It is a little hard to understand for me, too, but since quite a number of men say so, then i believe it is so! And i guess it is even harder to believe in for him since he has always had the two things coming together, and associated one with the other. Does he have to do some exercises or something to learn to separate them?

You say hypnosis can help... We cannot go to a hypnotherapist, but is it possible to try to hypnotise each other? Although when i imagine the scene, it makes me laugh  I dont know how i would stay serious if he were trying to hypnotise me! I should confess though that i still haven't opened the links on it that you gave me, so maybe i will have no questions after i do... i promise to do it tonight!

Hey how did your wife take all these things? Is she multiple, too? How do these cards work? Is it the kind of hypnosis they show in movies, when the person's consciousness shuts off and stuff?

Prostate stimulation... It should be done through one's butt, if we call the things with their names? I haven't suggested it yet, but i really dont believe he would do that, because he associates that stuff with gay world, even though to me it's fine.... Not that i'm eager to stick something in his butt, but for the sake of the experiment... you know what i mean!  I'm gonna find out more about it with him.

KSMO. Yes, i've noticed from your other posts that it is your favourite!  Does it work for your wife? I am going to check that forum soon! I would like to try that or any other technique for multiple orgasms for myself, too!! How much time can it take for it to start working?

Thanks again for taking your time to reply to my questions!

Good luck!

 



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millite1962@yahoo.com
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         Date Posted: 10/14/2005 4:32 PM                       


I believe anyone can have multiple orgasms male or female. I read about this simple techniqe about 15 years ago, and it has never failed. You basically have to change your thinking about sex/orgasm instead of trying to have an orgasm try not to have one. When i go down on a woman, when she starts to get close to climax i stop for a minute and back off, let her cool down then start again then back off again when she gets close. Do this 3-4 times the first time and then when you continue she will have incredible multiple orgasms. I have done this with 3 women so far and they have all had multiples which get better after they get use to the teasing technique. This can also be done with intercourse when you get close stop and take a break a few times i have done this and had the best longest orgasms of my life.

Let me know how it goes, if nothing else its fun to try. Remember the goal is not to have an orgasm for as long as possible.

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Wish It Were So
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         Date Posted: 10/14/2005 10:55 PM                       

Reply to : Dancing on the Water

You don't say whether you have multiples, but since you are interested in him having them, I assume yes. You also mentioned that it was hard for you to understand the point of no return where men lose control and then detumesce (go limp); again, an indication that you can pass orgasmic climax points and go again, without going limp.

As Pandragon (?) wrote:

"The first major hurdle in any MMO technique is learning how to deal with The Point of No Return. Until a man learns how to resolve this issue and separate orgasm from ejaculation, a partner will usually only serve as a distraction and make MMO's even more difficult to achieve."

This is the big problem with all male MMO techniques: They aren't natural, require practice and holding back -- up to the point of return, stop; up to the point of return, stop, etc. I did all these tricks for several years masturbating but it became a drag after a while and as I aged the O's grew weaker and weaker as my wife's grew stronger and stronger (it's not just the lack of MMOs, it's the intensity that man lack, particularly as they age).

As for doing MMOs with your partner: GOOD LUCK!! Tried it (repeatedly) with my wife. A couple of times, I had a couple of smaller O's but control is very difficult and she has to "let go" at precisely the right moments. Again, the whole male MMO thing is NOT natural. If it were, we wouldn't have to jump through zen-like hoops. The problem with partners too is they "distract," as the previous poster indicated. Not very bonding when you are focusing on your hard-to-control penis, directing your partner to go, stop, let go, etc. -- it all became just a form of mutual masturbation. Then my wife would want oral to have her earthrocking series of real MMOs. Oral sex too is masturbation with the help of a partner. Bottom line: The best sex (hand, oral) is all masturbation. Even partner sex that aims at something is mutual masturbation (using each other's organs in a very rigid way to reach a goal. No pun intended).

One of the most popular books on MMOs for women and (supposedly) for men is almost entirely devoted to mutual masturbation (one person doing the other at a time). See Brauer and Brauer, _ESO: Extended Sexual Orgasm_. Read through the lines: All the ecstatic experiences are related by women, not men. But they need to sell books and promise men some benefit for doing all that work of giving one hour "rising" orgasms to their girlfriends. Go to amazon.com and read the posts: They all talk about "it was the best thing I ever did or gave my wife/girlfriend." I don't think a single one mentioned it helping a man get ESOs. That's pretty indicative of how pie-in-the-sky male MMO is.

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PanDragon


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         Date Posted: 10/15/2005 3:33 AM                               


  Hi Dragon !

  Hi Dancing

>How's life?

  Great! Thanks for asking.  

>"Has he actually said he wants to experience MMO's? Is he willing to spend time and effort learning techniques to achieve them?" Yes, he said he wants, but as for time, he is one of the people who want things now, and who can give it up if it doesn't work for too long...

  Well, it's good that he's interested in the idea of MMO's. But unfortunately, the tendency to "want things now" would most likely prevent him from making much progress in a full-blown method like KSMO. So I would not suggest it for him at this time. Of course, if you learned it first and share your new feelings with him, he might be inspired to commit more fully to the idea of learning a technique like KSMO...

  It's not that KSMO is difficult to learn, but it does require some patience and an ability to just relax and enjoy whatever feelings come up during practice. Ironically, the more pressure a guy puts on himself to achieve MMO's, the less likely they are to occur. So I wouldn't try to get him to do it unless he really wants to. In fact, let it be his idea to try it.

> Also, he is quite satisfied with our sex life, and me too, actually, but if it can be better, why not try?  And i think it can simply be fun to do! But we want to try!!

  That's great! It's always good to start from a place of contentment rather than frustration. So here's my advice: For now, keep things light and consider trying something simple like this hypnosis Cd http://www.wendi.com/html/ultimate_orgasm.html.

  I bought this years ago, before I learned KSMO. This little program actually gave me some of my very first orgasms without any physical stimulation!

  And the great thing about it is, it works for both men and women, so you can both enjoy it. Plus there's no performance pressure involved. It's easy to do. You just listen to it once a day and the effects keep getting stronger. Men can use it to last longer and some even have multiple orgasms. Women say it helps them reach multiples more quickly and easily. At the very least, it should spice things up a bit for both of you.

>  You know, the first thing that's gonna be hard (and i guess, it's similar with most men, huh?) is that it seems hard for him to realize that an orgasm can happen separately from ejaculation. It is a little hard to understand for me, too, but since quite a number of men say so, then i believe it is so! And i guess it is even harder to believe in for him since he has always had the two things coming together, and associated one with the other. Does he have to do some exercises or something to learn to separate them?

  Well, the thing is there are several ways to achieve MMO's, but most men only know about one of them, and it doesn't work very well.

  In my experience, almost all books and videos that claim to teach MMO's, involve the same basic technique - building the PC muscle and teasing the ejaculation process (much like millite described).

  This includes Tantra, Manak Chia's method, Barbara Keesling's book, ESO, etc. In my opinion, they're difficult to learn and at best, produce orgasms that feel weak and  "unnatural."  All of these methods teach men to control their genitals, and in my opinion, that's why they don't work very well. Because orgasm, by nature, is a state of being out of control!  

  That's why I always recommend techniques that are not based on control like: KSMO, Prostate Stimulation, Amygdala Clicking, and Hypnosis.

  Although each one is different, what they all have in common is that they enable men to experience intense orgasms without having to worry about The Point of No Return. But in fact, none of these methods are "exercises."

  For instance, KSMO requires neither skill nor muscle control. It is more a process learning to let go, enhance your arousal response, relax through feelings of intense pleasure, and fully express (and share) those feelings as they surface. In fact, you might say, it's the opposite of exercise!

 > You say hypnosis can help... We cannot go to a hypnotherapist, but is it possible to try to hypnotise each other?

  DEFINITELY. Of course, it would take some study and practice, but just about anyone can learn how to hypnotize a willing person. If learning to hypnotize sounds like work, then just try some professionally recorded Cd's or videos. They're not as good as a real live hypnotist, but they can still be fun and effective.

>  Although when i imagine the scene, it makes me laugh  I dont know how i would stay serious if he were trying to hypnotise me! I should confess though that i still haven't opened the links on it that you gave me, so maybe i will have no questions after i do... i promise to do it tonight!

  Well, the cool thing is you don't have to learn how to hypnotize each other. There's literally thousands of audio and video hypnosis programs for sale on the net that can help improve your sex life just by listening to them. That's why I recommend starting out with something like this Cd: http://www.wendi.com/html/ultimate_orgasm.html. Try it for a couple weeks and see how you feel.

Hey how did your wife take all these things? Is she multiple, too?

  My wife just learned KSMO from me and we also recently started using hypnosis for fun. She's also interested in learning Amygdala Clicking, she just hasn't gotten around to it yet. But she was already the most orgasmic woman I'd ever been with long before I learned to have MMO's.

  The cool thing is what happened when I started having multiples and sharing them with her. It's hard to describe, but when we make love now, we can feel each others orgasms to the point where eventually we don't even know who's orgasm we're both feeling. It just feels like one huge orgasmic wave that we're both riding together. It goes on and on, basically until we're both so buzzed we can't take anymore and have to stop.

> How do these cards work? Is it the kind of hypnosis they show in movies, when the person's consciousness shuts off and stuff?

  Well, it's kinda hard to explain since I haven't even read much about this type of hypnosis yet. But the way it works is when you talk to someone, you can say things in a way that they will have trouble disagreeing with you. For instance, if I say:

  DO NOT THINK ABOUT A PINK ELEPHANT!

  What did you just think about when you read that sentence? A pink elephant, right? That's because your subconscious couldn't help it. Once you read those words, it had to form a picture to match them. So the cards are just a bunch of phrases like that, designed to take advantage of how the mind works, and slip in suggestions without any resistance. You'd be surprised what you can do with a little practice...

>Prostate stimulation... It should be done through one's butt, if we call the things with their names? I haven't suggested it yet, but i really dont believe he would do that, because he associates that stuff with gay world, even though to me it's fine.... Not that i'm eager to stick something in his butt, but for the sake of the experiment... you know what i mean!  I'm gonna find out more about it with him.

  Well, I wouldn't push the issue or anything. Anything "butt related" was TOTALLY out of the question for me until I was 27 years old. I never liked anything like that and assumed I never would. I only tried prostate stimulation because a good friend of mine, who's opinion I respect, convinced me that the Aneros was the coolest new device for MMO's and I would be missing out if I didn't try it. And ya know what? He was absolutely right.

>KSMO. Yes, i've noticed from your other posts that it is your favourite!  Does it work for your wife?

  To say YES!!!!, would be an understatement. I could write a small book about how much KSMO has done for both of us.

 >I am going to check that forum soon! I would like to try that or any other technique for multiple orgasms for myself, too!! How much time can it take for it to start working?

  Well, for guys, the average practitioner (who posts questions in the forum and seeks advice from the community when needed) experiences his first multiple orgasm within 1-3 months of beginning practice. Sometimes it takes longer because of impatience, misunderstanding the instructions, or emotional baggage. For me, it took 3 weeks. I even know a few guys who had multiples the very first DAY they tried KSMO.

  We haven't had many women posting over the years. But I think it's reasonable to expect that most women will progress a little faster than men, depending on their emotional feelings about sex and whatever past experiences they may have had. Here's a link to a thread by one of our newer female members, "lalyroth," where she describes her experiences learning KSMO from the very beginning: http://jackjohnston.ccwerks.net/wb/default.asp?action=9&read=1950&fid=38#5089

>Thanks again for taking your time to reply to my questions!

>Good luck!

 

>Dancing

  My pleasure!




"There is no such as thing as piano playing; I have tried it many times and nothing came of it."

- Paul Watzlawick, author of "The Language of Change"

Message edited by: PanDragon on 10/15/2005 01:43:27[Server Time/GMT -8 Pacific Time]

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Dancing on the Water

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Posts : 5
Reg : 09/21/2005




         Date Posted: 10/16/2005 7:48 AM                           

Hello Wish It Were So !
 
Thanks for your answer  
 
>You don't say whether you have multiples, but since you are interested in him having them, I assume yes.
 
Yes, i am interested in them, but i am not sure what i have can be called multiples. I can have several orgasms, but i have to make pauses between them, so i guess they are not multiple, but just a few in a row. I would like to experience what people describe here.
 
>best sex (hand, oral) is all masturbation. Even partner sex that aims at something is mutual masturbation
 
Hmmm. Yes, i guess i agree, in a way. But it is all just words, after all, and if we both feel good, and can help each other feel good, then what the heck!  Also, mutual masturbation would mean (as i see it) "doing" (dont like this word, but you know what i mean) just one person at a time, and taking turns. But i have seen people post here (PanDragon is one of them, right?) who can have multiple orgasms, or energy orgasms almost simultaneously, and during intercourse (again, dont like this word, but this you can't call masturbation already).
 
>they all talk about "it was the best thing I ever did or gave my wife/girlfriend."
 
Yes, i know, they are many, but i believe there are people who don't just give or take, but share, and i want to learn from them  I know what you meant, though - that it is easier to do for a woman than for a man (did i understand you correctly?)
 
>I don't think a single one mentioned it helping a man get ESOs.
 
Well, i want to help my man get it! I dont know if i will succeed in it, but i am eager to try
 
PanDragon:
 
>It's hard to describe, but when we make love now, we can feel each others orgasms to the point where eventually we don't even know who's orgasm we're both feeling. It just feels like one huge orgasmic wave that we're both riding together. It goes on and on, basically until we're both so buzzed we can't take anymore and have to stop.
 
It sounds SOOO GOOOOOOOD !!!!!!!!!!! Oh i want to have it like that too!!!
 
>I could write a small book about how much KSMO has done for both of us.
 
Why not? I think you write very well
 
>What did you just think about when you read that sentence? A pink elephant, right?
 
Exactly !
 
>Well, I wouldn't push the issue or anything. Anything "butt related" was TOTALLY out of the question for me until I was 27 years old. I never liked anything like that and assumed I never would.
 
Yeah, he is about that age, too, so i am careful with it.
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